i'm thinking of you
day and night
even though you don't speak a word
your voice is still in my head
do you know i think of you everyday?
do you even know my love for you?
He did not reject to work with me for the coming soccer match... maybe it is a chance to us to talk after long time.... maybe it is purposely made by yan xin...whatever just a guess... in some way, i am a bit nervous, I asked few of my friends, they all gave a simple answer" be natural", but sometimes It is not easy to do so... Even I also encourage myself in this way....hehe ....
Yesterday before UT, yan xin msn me, she said" sometimes she really doesn't understand what I am thinking or doing, I just acting in other people's eyes, to be happy, positive and cheerful, and please spend more time on finding yourself and THINKING!!! she was quite true to say that, I am not such people to always funny and most of the time is in negative mood... :( I told myself when I back to home from Pan Ping's house, in my life there are some people I really cared and loving, but one of my goal is to know many people and make a lot of friends from all over the place, the reason I gave for this, just very simple, because I think in the day of future, We will help each other, and very believe in " duo ge peng you duo tiao lu"... maybe I am a bit over in this specific area... Further more, I don't know the real reason...
Sometime qiqi , huan huan will envy me to have such happiness family, my dad and mum they loving each other, and I have one blood brother at home, the rest of family members all happy to stay in together... I am proud to be one of them in this big , happy family!!! However nothing is perfect, I am like a follower or soldier, to do anything asked by my father, can not say NO, or rejected, I am unhappy and hurt by this... between Father and me, we TRYing hard to treat each other like a friend, can share good or bad times in our daily life, It is NEVER BE DONE...He still acted as A FATHER, I am still be his kids... not really self... Remember last time i wrote in QQ nickname, I can lose myself, my love, my friendship, but can't LET DAD DOWN, which is the only thing I can not do... is it true ? yea... think so... no... maybe it is so called a excuse I often gave to myself...
......don't know.... how ??? ask for help??? or keep going like this ??? changing??? NO.... WORKING HARD TO IMPROVE ON!!!
No matter what, I am living with all friends, please accompany , motivate and besides me all the time.... I am just very scared lonely... Even I like watch movie or go beach alone...
QI SHI WO ZI JI DO BU LIAO JIE ZI JI ---- KE BEI......
i say nothing but
i know you know how i feel
im waiting for the day.
wangjing
14th december
republic poly
for you to tell me.
my family especially my father
ice-cream
xjy
bws
that you love me too.
be happy everyday
study hard